Today was an amazing day!  For the most part, I was pretty productive considering the day started out pretty late (because I slept til 11am). Hehe.  I was in no mood whatsoever to do much of anything considering it was my day off from work and I didn't have school to worry about.  However, that changed!  I began cooking chicken alfredo for a late lunch and got fed up with the mess in this apartment.  So, I cooked dishes and cleaned the entire kitchen.  I also worked on the living room somewhat, which is to be finished tomorrow.  Colten also helped a lot with cleaning up and just picking up around the place.   After we ate, we decided to go swimming.  After weeks worth of attempts, the water was FINALLY warm enough to be comfortable enough to swim in!  : ) YAY!  So, for three hours, we swam.  Instead of using diving sticks, we used quarters to throw in and hunt down, which gave us something to do so we wouldn't be bored after only thirty minutes.  It was a great way to just relax and have fun.  We haven't got to spend time together like that in such a long time.  It was way overdue!  I absolutely loved every minute of it!  Of course, if I would have let him, Colten would have stayed in there for AGES!  That boy is a fish, I swear!! Haha.  We also took a few pics and this one is by far my favorite one!  I played with it a little using ColorSplash on my iPhone :).  Haha!  Anyway, then we went for a little walk and came home and just relaxed a bit more and watched the new Prince & Me movie.  It was cute!  So basically today was awesome and much needed.  I definitely got my dose of Vitamin D! : )  And my dose of fiance time!  : )

Meltdown 101

So it seems that I'm a PRO in Meltdown 101.  As soon as one thing gets to me bad enough for me to really be upset by it and sit down and cry, everything else snowballs in on me and I experience the full extent of my fears, worries, stress, and many other emotions and feelings.  I think a big part of it is stressing due to finals.  It was my first semester taking my law classes so it was quite stressful...however, I did VERY well in every one of those classes, including my Contracts class, so it feels pretty great.  But it seems that today, everything else overshadowed that greatness.

I know it seems stupid and childish, but I've never been very good dealing with my feelings when it comes to REALLY wanting something and realizing it might not become a reality.  Again, as soon as I say what it is, you're very likely to just laugh, but it is what it is!  Colten came home with the idea that he could get me an iPhone.  Yes...there you have it!  A guy he works with (let's just say he's not working just for the money!!) had one laying around because he switched to T-Mobile soon after purchasing the iPhone.  So, there it was...just laying there not being used.  Colten came home with it this morning when he got off of work and pretty much said I could have it.  For those of you who don't truly understand this situation: if I went out and bought it, I would spend nearly $400 if not more.  And here it is, in my possession for NOTHING.  The only thing I would have to pay for would be a case to keep it protected and the monthly $30 data charge.  At first, that seemed like nothing, but the more I thought about it and the more my parents questioned me, I really do understand that $30 may not sound like much, but it does add up quickly!  And I also know that I could save that money and spend it on something to help pay for my dream wedding that will be happening in the not-so-far-off future.  But how can I turn away from a deal like this?  Well, I broke down about never having money that I need/want and still being in school, being totally sick of school, working a part-time job at basically minimum wage, and living in a small apartment that I thought I loved at first but not so much anymore.  Once I became upset about possibly not getting to activate the iPhone to start using, everything else piled up and boy was it crazy!  And this was only about an hour ago.  But once again, my mother saves the day and talks to me about it.  For some reason, just talking to her about something and getting just a little reassurance sure helps tons!  I have no idea where I would be without my mommy! I ♥ her!  So, now I'm feeling better, but I'm still anxiously awaiting the final decision of my parents to tell me whether or not I can activate the phone or if I will be giving it back to Colten to give to the guy at work he got it from.

I really do understand where they are coming from.  Although I'm paying for "most" of my groceries and gas (I've also been paying my AT&T U-verse bill for internet and tv) with my paychecks, there is no way possible for me to pay all of my bills with my previously mentioned part-time basically minimum wage job.  Not with my rent being about $700 each month!  And thinking of all the other things I want and need, it does seem very childish.  But what can I say?! I got my heart set on it and when that happens...it's just not a very good picture!  However, in my defense, I did downgrade my tv service to save about $30 a month and once I move in July, I will be paying $300 less on rent, and I will be splitting my U-verse bill AND my electric bill with Colten.  So, that's a lot of money saved!  Hopefully my parents see it that way too and agree to let me keep the phone :).  We shall see (hopefully soon)!

So, there's Meltdown 101 for today...hopefully for the week!  I don't know if I can take another one this week, but the good news is that after tomorrow at 1pm, I will be done with this semester and will officially have my first semester of law classes under my belt!  I just can't wait to graduate next year and get a job with my degree working with a law office or government agency :).  Sounds exciting...I know!!  Sadly, I will be working all week, but it's money in the bank and more to save towards bills, groceries, gas, and all kinds of other things that must be paid for!

I must say, though, that although I do have meltdowns and feel that things just aren't going my way or whatnot, I do sit back and realize that my life is NOT.THAT.HARD.  I am very lucky and truly blessed compared to all of those that have it way worse.  But when it hits, it hits hard and there's not much one can do or say to calm me down and make me see things from someone else's perspective...

When you talk, all I hear is BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.

I've had ENOUGH!  I've been employed for a few months now, but I have no money in savings to show for it!  In my own defense, I admit that I haven't been employed in a while so having my own money has been amazing, so obviously I spent a lot of it when I didn't necessarily need to or have to.  But on the other hand, I've had enough!  I'm done wasting money on fast food restaurants and stupid things at HEB on breaks...Finished!  Starting today, I set a goal to eat better and save my money better.  So far so good!  I made a list for the rest of the week, and Colten and I went grocery shopping in between classes earlier today.  So now I have NO REASON to spend money for the rest of the week except for gas :).  And maybe to get some stamps to mail mom's mother's day card!  I'm ready to have food in the house again and to save my money.  And it all starts now! 

On another subject, I only have about a week and a half left of this semester, and the stress begins!  I'm really worried about my Intro to Law class.  His exams are BOGUS, but I made an A on the midterm...so hopefully I'll do pretty well on the final!  I'm fed up with him though.  This professor goes off on rants about nothing important to the class.  He's gone off on World War II stuff, random Berlin information, random facts and tidbits about some cases he's been a part of, where he goes to conferences and what he does in his spare time.  One would think that the cases he talks about would relate to the topics discussed in class, but they're not.  I feel like I'm teaching myself this information rather than being taught by him.  I've had enough.  I dread this class every week, and thank goodness this is the last lecture class.  I have the final next Tuesday and then I'm DONE with him! :) Yay!  And after next Thursday, the semester is OVER.  This law stuff has been a pretty good change of pace for me.  I've been doing very well in all of my classes (which is a change from my kinesiology classes) and I'm understanding all of this law stuff.  I'm taking Criminal Law and Evidence over the summer, so it'll be interesting!  So far so good!  
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