Granny Time

About this time of the year is when it really hits me HARD that my granny is no longer with us.  I know she is in a better place and everything, but I miss her endlessly and wish I had more time with her.  We didn't always see eye to eye (but then again, I was in junior high/high school and didn't know much better), but I know we had a special bond that will never be taken from me.  She was always there when I needed her, and she was even there when I didn't KNOW I needed her, but she knew.  She had things about her that not everyone liked, but I know that my family was always glad she was there. 

This year is especially hard, and I honestly didn't realize it at first.  Being in a new apartment where I have room for a tree, I needed a Christmas tree to put up.  So, I talked to my cousin, and now the Christmas tree that I use is the one my grandma used for so many years.  You can definitely tell it's been through a lot of wear and tear, but it's nothing a few strings of lights and whatnot can't fix.  Seeing it up in my apartment every day kind of ate away at me until I realized what was wrong.  I miss seeing it put up in her house and looking forward to everyone being crammed in her living room so we can open gifts.  The holidays are hard without her, as I'm sure they're hard for any family that has suffered a loss.

I have many of her things up around my apartment so that I am constantly reminded of her, but the holidays are just the worst.  I miss my granny and I just really wish I had more time with her so that I could express just how much she meant to me, because I know as a kid, I didn't show her as much as I should have....but then again, I was a kid!  Seeing her in the last few days of her life was the hardest.  And no matter what, I can never think of her and not think of her in those days when she suffered the most.  I know I'm supposed to remember the good times and everything, but it broke my heart to see her in pain.  But every time I think of her in that hospital bed, I also remember just how peaceful she looked after she died.  I was in her living room with my brother when she passed away, but I will never forget hearing the news and being heartbroken as I was driven nearby to the nursing home. 

Granny, you are always in my heart and I am thankful for everything you ever did for me...I know it was a lot!  You were there for me when no one else was, and I am eternally grateful for that.  You were a very strong and independent woman, and I can only pray that I will be even half of that as I grow up.  I will never forget you!  You touched my heart in ways no one else could or will.  I love you.

I cherish the ring my mom had made for me in my granny's memory.  That was the #1 thing on my Christmas list last year and she made sure I got it.  I now wear that ring daily on a chain around my neck so that her memory is as close to my heart as possible.

House of Night

I've read the Harry Potter series and the whole Twilight saga, but I must admit, the House of Night book series is seriously amazing.  Seriously.  I just finished the 5th book of the series and I'm very tempted to get dressed, get in my car, get gas because it's practically on empty, and drive down 183 to go buy the next book, Tempted.  Ironic huh? :).  But seriously, I started reading the first book about 2 weeks ago, and I'm already onto the last one of the new installment.  Yes, it's so bad ass that P.C. and Kristin Cast continued it with an installment!  From beginning to end, each book has captivated me, and it's all I could think about!  I haven't done this much reading in a long time, which is good because I've missed it and I'm done with school for 5 weeks and I deserve to do a little reading for fun!  And fun it is!  It's so refreshing to be able to just sit down with a good book and get lost in it, and then to pick up the next book of the series and get lost in that one too!  I'm pretty sure Colten is sick of me reading...but I did get him interested in this House of Night series that he's like 100 pages into the first book, Marked! :).  Heck yes!  Anyway, these books sort of remind me of a Twilight/Harry Potter mix (which is why I mentioned them earlier), but it's wayyy better! In my opinion anyway.  So, I'm just throwing this out there so that more people can be introduced to the House of Night and Zoey Redbird (yes, there's some Cherokee Indian stuff in them too...along with the whole vampyre moving to a place away from humans...).  Definitely a good read!

You've Got to be Kidding Me

So I took Exam 2 for my History class this morning and then took my History final at noon.  Now that's a LOT of history, but anyway.  That's not the point.  Our professor said that he was going to post our grades this afternoon, and I was excited because I felt very confident after I turned in my final.  So ... I came home, relaxed a bit, took a shower, and then I checked my grades online.  I looked at my grade and it was a freakin D!!  Hell no it wasn't supposed to be a D!  I had all of my grades and calculated it and I should have a B.  Uh, that's TWO letter grades difference.  What the hell?!  So ... I look at the details of my grades and see that my grade from Exam 2 that I took this morning wasn't there...it was showing a zero.  Soooo not ok!  So then I start to have a panic attack, thinking that it was too late to take the second exam and that I would actually have a zero for that grade and a D overall.  I email my professor, but that obviously could take days for a response.  Then I called him at his office, even though his office hours ended an hour earlier.  I was super lucky that he was still there ... he said that I had just caught him before he left.  Turns out he just didn't pick up the tests from the Testing Center yet and so he didn't have my grade for Exam 2.  He explained that if what I was telling him was true, that I took the exam this morning and whatnot, that I would be fine and he would try to have my grade fixed by Friday.  You've got to be kidding me!  I had a major panic attack over nothing.  This is no small thing ... I have to have a 2.0 GPA at the end of this semester (tomorrow) to stay at ACC.  And that D would totally not help.  But now that I've talked to the professor, everything will be fine.  I even have proof that I took the exam this morning and the grade I got ... so it's not just my word against his.  :).  So, long story short, my emotions have been at an all time low and then straight to an all time high, realizing that my GPA is good and I just have to take my Chem final tomorrow and be DONE with this semester.  But seriously...you've got to be kidding me!

Oh, by the way, I kicked ASS on my final! :) Hence the B! Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Truckin' Along.

Only 2 more days of stress and tests and then it's another semester down! :). I'm excited for Christmas break ...4 Christmases, starting next weekend on the 19th, LOTS of family, and 5 weeks off from school! How can I not be excited about that??

I'm also looking forward to spring semester because I'll be starting my paralegal classes! Changing my major might just be what I've been needing for a long time! I haven't been this excited for school in quite some time, so ignore all of that excitement because when it comes down to it, who the heck is EVER excited for school??

Oh, and my apartment is B.A.D.A.S.S. Just sayin. It's by far the best apartment I've had since moving to Austin. It has a fireplace and vaulted ceilings. Hello?? GORGEOUS! I love it even better now that it's freakin clean as heck because Colten is amazing and cleaned it on his days off while I studied my ass off for finals this week. Plus, I have our tree up and the Christmas decorations, so again ... GORGEOUS! I love it, in case that wasn't obvious. I also love living off of Mopac and in North Austin. It's a very nice change from Downtown and 35. I don't like that it's so far to Hilary and Josh's apartment, but it gives me a chance to do my own thing, so it's good.

My relationship with Colten is amazing, to sum it up in one word. Next Saturday we will have been together for 6 months! It seems shorter than that but longer at the same time. I know, it's weird but whatever. I have never been so happy with anyone, so all is good! We care about each other and don't piss each other off (that's an AWESOME characteristic of a relationship don't ya think?). We also have never really had a big fight, which to me and compared to all of my past relationships, is the best thing ever! Of course we have mini-arguments (and I mean MINI), but it's healthy. And he never gets mad and storms off...we talk everything through until things are okay. :) Long story short, I'm happy! And I'm pretty sure he's happy too... :). And we both deserve to be happy, so that's all that matters!

Ok, enough ranting. It's time for me to get back to studying for my 2 History tests tomorrow. And after that, I have a Government final, a Chem final, and a Chem Lab final .... and then I'm officially done on Thursday at 1:15pm. Yay!
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